Christmas is the season of... asking.

One of the great lessons we teach our children at Christmas time, is about... asking! I know, you were expecting me to say "giving", right? Well, from a child's perspective, its all about asking.

Our youngest son, Hunter, gave us a Christmas list when he was smaller, and we were very happy when we were able to fill his little list. But then, on Christmas morning, after he had opened everything, he looked sad. We pressed him until he finally told us he had actually prepared two lists. He kept the second one hidden. He said, "If Santa were real, he would know what I had asked for on the other list!"

Score one for Hunter's scientific approach.

We used it as a teachable moment to have the whole "Santa" discussion with him. We told him about how much we love him, and how we want him to be taken care of, and to find enjoyment in the things we are able to give him. And yes, Renee and I learned our lesson, as well!

Even if we don't always get it right as a parent, we cannot escape the fact that this is one time of the year when there is a whole lot of asking going on! As I was reading John, chapter six, the other day, I was overwhelmed by how much this passage has to teach us, concerning the subject of asking. Its the very familiar story of Jesus feeding the 5,000, with just 5 loaves and two fish. As I read through it again, I was impressed by one key thing. Jesus teaches us to ask God to meet our needs!

To focus the disciple's attention, Jesus asks Philip where they could go and buy food for all of the people. Philip had been with Jesus long enough that he should have turned and said, "Master, I have yet to see a need you cannot meet. Please show us how you will fill all of these people." He should have asked for Jesus to be Jesus.

Instead, Philip went scientific, and calculated the minimal amount of money needed to buy the minimal amount of food. After being presented with the little boy's fish, Jesus pauses to thank the Father, then passes out enough food so that the people were full, and everyone could eat as much as they wanted.

What a miracle!

But then the epilogue. Jesus has the disciples gather the remaining fragments, so that, "nothing is wasted." When I saw that, I realized there could have been no miscalculation on Jesus part, concerning the amount of bread that had been passed out. In fact, with thousands of people spread out, Jesus knew in His Spirit there were uneaten fragments out among the people. He knew what each and every person needed, in order to become full.

I wonder if there were people in the crowd who had Philip's attitude, and had only eaten the minimum amount. Could it be, that while some had eaten until they were full, there were a few who grew anxious as to whether or not there was enough food to go around? Had they taken barely enough, when they should have held out their hand for more?

This Christmas, remember it is no accident that Jesus was born in "Bethlehem", which means, "House of Bread". God even put an exclamation point on the matter, when he provided a manger at the scene of the Nativity. A manger, simply put, is a feeding trough. In a world that is starving for purity and righteousness, and peace, God generously gives us Jesus! He is a buffet of grace.

What a great opportunity we have, to teach children how to ask God to meet their needs. No secret lists. No unfounded reservations. Just good old fashioned "asking" God to give! Its as simple as that.

learning NOT to quit

Yesterday, at WonderWorks, we taught kids how to stick to it, even in the face of adversity. Our lesson was from Nehemiah, chapter 4. The Israelites were working to re-build the wall around Jerusalem, but were facing struggles from inside and outside their city. There was no actual fixed battle, but the war of words was intense! The enemy was almost able to overcome their efforts by simply taunting and threatening.

I pointed out three things to the children. #1 God helps us FIGHT. #2 God helps us FOCUS. #3 God helps us FINISH. Interestingly, I asked the kids if they had ever stopped doing something they loved because other children made fun of them. Hands went flying up! One child shared about giving up flying his kite because another boy made fun of its design. Another young man said he quit riding his bike while he was trying to learn, because he was teased for being uncoordinated as he learned.

Our kids felt the heart of this lesson deeply. I think adults do as well. Quitting can become a habit, and after a while, we find ourselves surrounded by the rubble of unfinished plans. Like the torn down wall around Jerusalem, these experiences rock our confidence and tear down our persevearance.

The Israelites REMEMBERED God was on their side, and fighting with them. They didn't just pray about it. They prayed and worked! They also REDEEMED the stones. Each building block has to be handled with care and cleaned to be useful again. This was a very focused effort. The stones had to fit together, and they had to follow a plan. It took time. Every big decision to start something, must be followed by hundreds of little decisions to keep moving forward. Finally, they RESOLVED to take it personally. They were fighting for their families. For their sons and daughters. Something was at stake!


Prayer:
Lord, help me to fight, help me to focus, and help me to finish!

Philippians 1:6
being confident of this, that he who began a goodwork in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

Breaking Bad News to Kids

6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. 10 And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. 1 Peter 5:6-10

Kids and Bad News

As a parent, we feel very deeply about protecting our children. We even become tempted to shelter them from any bad news that would be difficult to share or tough for them to comprehend. (we do this with grownups, as well)

Even in the New Testament, leaders were confronted with how to navigate a crisis. Believers who were very deeply devoted Christ, were faced with loss of homes and livelihood, and even persecution. In other words, bad things were happening to good people.

The Apostle Peter sits down and writes a few lines to the elders of the church, who were helping families deal with bad news on a daily basis. In this letter, Peter reminds caregivers of a few basic truths about God’s watchcare in all of our lives.

Peter had learned how to trust Jesus. He had literally been through the storms with Him. I pray you do not need to refer to this blog, at any time in the near future. But, someone much wiser than me once said, there are many storms in this life and we are usually in one of three states. We are about to head a storm, we're in the middle of one, or we are just coming out of one.

I have put together a few reminders we can share with our children, when confronted with bad news. You alone should decide what news is age appropriate, and the amount of details to share. But, when the news is bad, these points will serve as an anchor during rough weather. Be sure and tell your child...

1.     We are in God’s hand. Nothing can remove us from God’s care. His love for us is not changed by our circumstance. His grip is tight. We are surrounded by His grace, and He is still in control. (v.6)

2.     We can tell Him what is wrong. There is no lack of faith in acknowledging the bad news. Trust is knowing that He is taking care of us, even when things are going wrong. Bad news does not prove anything about God. But it can prove our trust in Him. (v.7)

3.     We will look to the Bible for guidance. We will not handle bad news by allowing the enemy any access in our life. We do not need to look to the ways that people who have no faith, cope with difficult situations. This will not take us out of our faith walk with the Lord. (v.8)

4.     We have people around us who can help, because they care about us and they know the kind of thing we are going through. We are not going to become isolated and draw away from our church family. We can pray with other people and get good advice from those we look to for leadership. They have faced bad news, and still trust in Jesus. We are helped by being a part of God’s family. (v.9)

5.     God will help us get through this. There will come a time when we will not hurt this way inside. God will help us feel better and show us how to remember His love. (v.10)

Prayer:

God, We know you are with us, even in this bad time. Help us to get through this, as we trust in your love. We pray for others who are going through bad news, and we thank you for the people around us who love us. We know you are with us right now and will stay with us every step of the way.

In Jesus’ name we pray, amen.

Blessing Baskets by Vicky Copeland

Today's guest blogger, Vicky Copeland, shares how her family has personalized this year's Blessing Baskets. Vicky serves as our Kindergarten Connect group teacher at WonderWorks, and is a vital part of our volunteer team. I asked her to share here experience, after I heard someone telling about how she and her husband were spending their Saturdays, going door-to-door, looking for families we could share a meal with, this Thanksgiving.

Our Pastor cast a Great Commission vision for Thanksgiving and I have been honored to serve on the Blessing Basket Team.   His vision was to prepare a basket of food for 400 families in our community. The basket is complete with a 15 lb. turkey, 25 other food items and the Book of John which will be distributed to the families to take home for Thanksgiving Day.  This is not a basket filled with the leftovers of our pantry but a meal designed especially for them to enjoy on Thanksgiving.  He felt there is sense of pride and dignity that belongs to all of us as we open our homes and share a meal with our loved ones, our children, our parents and other extended family during the holiday.  This gift allows families to remain in their home rather than going to a mission or watered gardens for this holiday meal. 

 

It was not only the vision of our Pastor to provide physical food for families but spiritual nutrition as well.  The only criteria for receiving a Blessing Basket is to attend our worship service the evening of November 18, 2012 at 6:00 p.m. to hear the gospel presented.   The message of John 6:35 is clear and on our hearts as we make all the necessary preparations.  

 

I love our Pastor's heart and his desire to hear from our Lord and to serve Him.  I have had the privilege of speaking with families personally and hearing heartfelt prayer requests.  My husband and I have been door to door and received many hugs and words of appreciation to pass on to our Calvary family.  I may not have been called to serve in Africa or Haiti but I truly feel the call of God on my life and I thank the Pastor for allowing me to be a tool the church and God can use to touch Joplin with the love of Jesus Christ.  I can hardly wait to make new friends on Sunday evening and watch the outpouring of love from an incredible body of believers who love the Lord with all of their hearts.  Thank you, Calvary and thank you Pastor Brad for this opportunity of service. 

In Christ,

Vicky Copeland

be amazed

"You alone are the Lord. You made the heavens, even the highest heavens, and all their starry host..." Nehemiah 9:6

As a boy, some of my fondest memories were the summer nights when my dad would bring us into the yard, and spread out a blanket, so the whole family could lay on our backs and look up at the stars. That is something my parents excelled at...creating memories. They planned and staged moments like that for us, and we loved it!

I love it even more, now, as a 45 year old. I realize that one of the best opportunities I have to teach kids about God, is when I can lead them to look at His creation and be amazed! I don't have to study ahead of time, or come up with trendy illustrations. No Phd. required! Just look around for a platform on which God can shine.

In Nehemiah 8, they built a stage for God. They raised up a platform where one man, Ezra, stood to read from the book of the Law. The Bible. They elevated God, and the result was amazement!

Its also a picture of family worship. Everyone who was old enough to understand, was gathered together, to listen and be amazed. (see Neh. 8:2). Look around for those moments to gather your family together, build a platform moment, and be amazed by God.

Prayer:
Lord, I elevate you in my life, today. I praise your name! Show me your glory, and I will reveal you to others. I stand amazed in your presence.
In Jesus name, amen!

How He loves us

With the Storm crushing in on our neighbors in the East, and a heated election coming up, I thought it would be refreshing to be reminded of God's love for us.

Sit down with your kids and tell them the story of your love for them. How you reacted when you heard the news that they were going to be the new addition to your family. How you work to make sure they have the things they need to keep warm. tell them about how you watch out for their safety and think about them during the day while they are in school or at work.

And then tell them the story of God's love for them.

Here are the lyrics to this song, by the David Crowder Band.

"How He Loves"
(originally by John Mark McMillan)

He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.

And oh, how He loves us, oh,
Oh, how He loves us,
How He loves us all

He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realise just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.

And oh, how He loves us, oh,
Oh, how He loves us,
How He loves us all

Yeah, He loves us,
Oh, how He loves us,
Oh, how He loves us,
Oh, how He loves.

And we are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If grace is an ocean, we're all sinking.
So Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don't have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about the way...

He loves us,
Oh, how He loves us,
Oh, how He loves us,
Oh, how He loves.
Yeah, He loves us,
Oh, how He loves us,
Oh, how He loves us,
Oh, how He loves.

Yeah, He loves us,
Oh, how He loves us...
Oh, how He loves us...
Oh, how He loves us.

Prayer:

God, we are grateful for your love. Thank you for the way you pour out mercy on our lives. Thank you for every step Jesus took as He carried the cross up to Calvary. Thank you for every step Jesus takes to be near us in our times of hurt, or worry, or fear. God help us to be a family that paints a picture of your love. Forgive us for the times when we have forgotten to love you and to love our neighbor. Erase our sin and give us a heart that loves like you do.

In Jesus' name. Amen.

know your kids :)

borrowed from Dan Scott's Blog

A lot of zeroes in our account

Read John 4

Technology is great. Before moving my family here to Joplin, I had my credit union account set up to send me deposit reminders if my balance was running below a certain point. I have since closed my account, but the reminders still come...daily. That particular feature does not recognize that my account is closed, so every morning, when I check my email, there is my reminder, showing $0 balance. In the computer's mind, it is time to make a deposit.

Wouldn't it be great if our families came with reminders like that? A ping would sound off on our phone when our spouse needs a hug, or a pop up flashes on our tv when our kids need to throw a ball around with us or have a book read to them. Imagine never missing an opportunity to invest ourselves in their lives

Instead, we must remind ourselves that every morning, the account stands at zero, and we must make a deposit! Our kids need hugs and "I love you's", today. Our spouse needs that gentle word of affirmation and to be told how grateful we are to have them in our life. It is time for a deposit!

For that to happen, we, ourselves, need to be constantly aware of the way God shows His love to us. Every day, God pours Himself into our life. He brings fresh awareness of His faithfulness and a full expression of His mercy. He gives us the ability to live our Christian life in surplus! As Psalm 23 states, "my cup overflows!"

John 4, sends us four important "zero" reminders. Think of it in these terms. Our family's spiritual health is measured by having a lot of zeroes in the account.

Zero Activity. In verse 6, we are alerted to the reality that we all need times of rest and refreshing. Christ was in the middle of what seems like a three year sprint! But He did not overlook the need to sit down for a few moments and catch His breath. We should sit down, every day with our family for a time to catch up and spend time "doing nothing", together.

Zero Balance. Verses 7 through 14 sound the alarm about our need for spiritual life. Remarkably, Jesus starts by asking the woman for a drink. She is surprised and caught off guard. Jesus then tells her He has what she needs. He will be her spiritual resource, if she will only ask Him for what He has to offer. Christ wants all of us to spend time asking. Our families need to hear us acknowledge that without Him, we have nothing, but with Him, we have everything we need! Let your children hear you asking God for guidance, asking for wisdom, asking for protection and asking for opportunities to serve Him. Most importantly, let them hear you asking God to fill you with His Spirit. And then teach them to start with a zero balance, and ask God to meet their needs.

Zero Reserves. Christ gets up close and personal with the woman, in verses 15 through 18. He wants her to understand and express her spiritual poverty. If she is to draw out spiritual abundance from Him, He must draw out spiritual bankruptcy from her. She cannot hold anything back. Teach your children not to keep secrets from the Lord. Confession literally means to "to come to an agreement". Our family must see transparency in our lives. It doesn't mean we confess everything in front of each other, but that we demonstrate the pattern. Our families must know that we hold nothing back from God, and in turn, He holds nothing back from us. Nothing in reserve.

Zero Overdraft. In John 4:27 - 34, His disciples return to find Jesus spending. Spending time with a person in need and spending His energy in a compelling presentation of the gospel. They were concerned that He was going to run out of energy and burn out on ministry. Jesus gave them great news! He was protected from spiritual overdraft because He was serving the Father.

“My food,” said Jesus, “is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work." -John 4:34

He was where God wanted Him to be, when God wanted him there, doing what God wanted Him to do. What a great encouragement to our family! Show your kids what serving God looks like. Help them understand how freeing it is to submit to God's will for your life. Lead them on a missionary journey on your own back yard. Involve them in sharing God's love with a lost and dying world.

Prayer:
Father, thank you for reminding me of your investment in my family. We have so very much! Lead us on a missional adventure as we serve you and tell others about you. We praise you for all the zeroes you have placed in our account!
Amen.

buzzer beater

Psalm 27:13-14 Yet I am confident I will see the Lord’s goodness while I am here in the land of the living.

Quitting can become a habit, if we're not careful. Its a parent's job to help our kids see hope. To help them understand all things are possible with God!

I remember when my boys were very small, we were going through a rough spot, financially. The car we were driving would shoot out plumes of white smoke, every time it was cranked. The guys at work would literally stand at the door of our shop, to watch me start it up, for the drive home.

One night we were heading back from a Christian concert, and the little car was huffing and puffing, like the little engine that could. My son, Zack, who was 3 at the time, said, "Daddy, we not got no car that works!" I said, "Son, I couldn't agree more."

But when we got home, I sat with my boys at our kitchen table, and shared my heart. I told them about how I trusted God. I explained how tithing was mommy and daddy's way of showing God we had hope in what He was able to do in our lives. By tithing, and by talking about tithing, we were teaching them about hope. We wrapped up by renewing our commitment to trust in God, by leading them in a family prayer.

As soon as I said "amen", the phone rang. It was Woody, a guy in my Sunday School class. He worked for the car manufacturer that made my vehicle. He said they were cleaning out a store room and had a never-used engine, the same year and make as mine, in a crate in a storeroom. They did not have a use for it and were going to throw it out. Very casually, he asked, "Could you use it?"

God had sank another game-winning buzzer beater! He had proven Himself to my kids, as a God of hope, who delivers.

Talk to your kids, today, about hope. Show them the ways you are putting your hope in God. Then watch God deliver!

Going Vertical

wingsuit base jumping from Ali on Vimeo.

There is this awesome video of base jumpers using wing suits to leap from sheer cliffs and glide along. They became bored with “just” flying away from the cliffs, so they developed the nerve to skim the edges, almost able to reach out and touch the rocks. It is amazing to watch, and I’m sure it is a rush to experience!
One problem... They cannot actually fly. The ride always ends with a deploying canopy and rapid deceleration. They are not flying because they cannot go vertical!
For a lot of believers there is the same kind of experience. Unless we surrender completely to God, and allow Him to crucify our flesh, we can only experience brief periods of emotional spirituality. The rush is followed by a long climb back up the hill, and the hope of another leap and a few seconds of air.
John experiences Christ a different way. Exiled and punished, he was to be alone and separated where it was believed he could have no impact. But John has a special skill set. He’s a Jesus man. He has wings. He prays in the Spirit. He can go vertical!


8 The Master declares, "I'm A to Z. I'm The God Who Is, The God Who Was, and The God About to Arrive. I'm the Sovereign-Strong."
9-17 I, John, with you all the way in the trial and the Kingdom and the passion of patience in Jesus, was on the island called Patmos because of God's Word, the witness of Jesus. It was Sunday and I was in the Spirit, praying. I heard a loud voice behind me, trumpet-clear and piercing…
Revelation 1 – The Message

His passion? His rush? Simply the patience of Jesus. He waits on the Lord. He gets his thrills from seeing God move, and rushing to join Him in His work! Whatever his circumstance, wherever he is assigned, that is his launch pad. The Lord meets him on a desolate island and lifts him to a view of Heaven. That is vertical!

Isaiah was another Jesus man. He was tasked with trying to stir the faith of a whole nation. He stirs them out of their apathy, towards a vertical relationship.

27-31 Why would you ever complain, O Jacob, or, whine, Israel, saying,"God has lost track of me. He doesn't care what happens to me"?Don't you know anything? Haven't you been listening?God doesn't come and go. God lasts. He's Creator of all you can see or imagine.He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath. And he knows everything, inside and out.He energizes those who get tired, gives fresh strength to dropouts.For even young people tire and drop out, young folk in their prime stumble and fall.But those who wait upon God get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles,They run and don't get tired, they walk and don't lag behind.
Isaiah 40:31 – The Message

Grow!

If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise.
Galatians 3:29

"Blowin’ up!" That is the newest expression to creep into our lexicon. It means something has reached the apex. The hottest band, the coolest designer or the latest viral video…they are all blowin’ up!

What is God bringing to life in your walk with Him? What has been growing toward becoming your passion? What is blowin’ up in your faith?

Prayer…
God, bring your work to the surface in my life. I will not suppress your will. My own desire has fallen into the soil and died. I am ready to live my faith out loud, in the light of day!


Grow! from Paul Frederick on Vimeo.

11 Ways to lose with your family

1. Pretend you know it all! Do not ask for help or seek advice from those who have expertise in building healthy families. Just make it up as you go along.
2. Don’t listen to each other. Be sure and stare at the TV or stay online whenever other family members are around. Do not share meals around the dinner table.
3. Create an atmosphere of crisis. Spend all your time putting out fires and being frustrated. Don’t plan, or budget, or set goals as a family.
4. Criticize often. Be sure to tear each other down in front of others. Name calling works great for this!
5. Never discipline your children. Try to be their best buddy, or better yet, try and live out your own unrealized dreams through them.
6. Be someone different at home than you are in public. Especially when it comes to church. Be “Ozzie and Harriet” on Sunday morning and then live like “the Simpson’s” the rest of the week.
7. Keep things as serious as possible. Don’t laugh often. Be so insecure that you cannot laugh at yourself, once and awhile. They might think you are human.
8. Talk to co-workers and friends about problems with your spouse more than you talk things through with your spouse. Your husband or wife will LOVE to hear how badly your co-workers and friends think they have blown it!
9. Take up hobbies that dominate your time and then guard your turf. Do not allow your family to violate “your space”. When something comes up, making you miss your appointment with your hobby, be sure and let your family know what a sacrifice you are having to make by being with them.
10. Never deal with the elephant in the room. Pretend its not there. It will just get better on its own.
11. Do not apologize when you are wrong. When one of the other members of your family messes up, or wrongs you, hold it against them as long and as often as possible.

What do you think? Is there something you could add to the list?


Many thanks, to Sam Rainer. He adapted a Newsweek article about ways to be a bad boss into a blog about ways for Pastors to be a poor leader to their staff. I adapted his ideas to concepts dealing with the family.